It's "The Simple Life" meets "The Bachelor" meets... every other reality show you've ever seen.
What is it? In the CW's latest reality dating competition, ten "big city women" compete for the heart, mind and rock solid abs of Matt, a third generation Missouri farmer who just happens to look and dress like a Chippendales dancer. Farmer Matt enters riding a tractor (shirtless, of course), with a
bleached white smile brighter than the blazing Missouri sun. Future episodes promise quilt sewing, bingo playing and "taking care of very large farm animals." Awesome.
Buzzed about: "Farmer Wants a Wife" was huge in Finland, Sweden and Germany, but just like reindeer jerky, ABBA and oppressive totalitarian regimes, some things just don't make the transcontinental flight to America. (Fun fact: Overseas, the show is called "Farmer Needs a Wife." Discuss.)
The "ooh" factor: Besides wearing improbably high heels and slutting it up for their
potential future husband, the ladies go on hayrides, catch chickens
and try to wear the lowest cut tops this side of "A Shot at Love." Standouts include Brook, a dead ringer for Jamie Lynn Spears (and nearly as bright) and L.A. native Stephanie, who overcomes her fear of chickens and steps in cow poop within her first 24 hours of country life. But it's Josie—"Farmer"'s requisite Omarosa—who makes things interesting when she ruins a perfectly peaceful hay ride with prognostications of the impending apocalypse. Way to harsh our mellow, Josie.
The "eh" factor: Seriously,
another reality dating competition? Consider this an early start to the summer reality glut, with upcoming premieres of shows like "Living Lohan," "Brooke Hogan Knows Best" and, yes, "Greatest American Dog." And we thought the wrath of the writers' strike was behind us...
The verdict: Sure, "Farmer" plays into the standard reality competition format, with the over-the-top elimination ceremonies, same-name contestants (there's Christa with a "C" and Krista with a "K") and the one token person of color (Kanisha, who knocks the stuffing out of her competition in the premiere episode's chicken relay race). But what it lacks in originality it makes up for in good-heartedness. Also, you can see down some of the girls' shirts.
"Farmer Wants a Wife" premieres Wednesday, April 30 at 9 p.m. ET/PT on the CW.
